Bizzare Daybreak
by 0Black0Hearts0
Summary: Crack. C'mon, 8 adolencent boys are going to be serious all the time? Yeah, right.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. :*(**

'_BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! __**SMASH!**__'_ It seems the latest of Hidan's alarm clocks have to join the other 73 in alarm clock heaven. Kakazu would be ticked. That money grubbing zombie-thing. After a sigh of annoyance, he rolled out of bed and got himself into a standing position. He walked over to a mirror and used a transforming jutsu, then admired himself in the mirror. He had shaggy brown hair and eyes like the sea after a storm. He was wearing a black short sleeved shirt and matching skinny jeans. His arms were covered with fishnet, along with black fingerless gloves. Why is he using a transformation jutsu you ask? Well, to make a long story short, he lost a bet with Itachi. He had to go to Konaha Ninja Academy for two weeks as a punishment for his too large ego. He continued to admire himself in the mirror for a couple of minutes, playing with his new hair that came down to his eyebrows. He trotted out of the base, only to stare at the _pink_ bicycle he had to ride to the academy. He glared intensely at the bike for a good ten minutes before shredding whatever ounce of hope he had of melting it.

-At the Base-

Pein sighed as he heard another one of Zetsu's terrifying outbursts. "AHHHHHHH! HIDANS KNOWS THESE COST ME MY PRECIOUS MONEY!" Rolling his eyes, the orange haired man ignored the noises and drifted back into sleep.

After searching the cabinets, pantry, and refrigerator for breakfast foods to no prevail, Itachi sighed deeply.

"Itachi, what's for breakfast?" asked the shark-man, trudging down the staircase.

"Since when am I the Akatsuki maid? I'm going to IHOP. Check you later" Itachi replied, walking out the huge wooden doors and racing off on his Black YZF-R15 motorcycle. Kisame slumped down. "I guess I'll go too…" He mumbled to himself, slowly shuffling over to his beat-up blue pick-up. (He's too big for a bike. XD)

Ah, Konaha Ninja Academy. It was a nice day, Clear blue skies, birds singing, people carrying about in there business, while oddly cheery because of the great day. Hidan wanted to slaughter every moving thing in sight. Scratch that, he wanted to slaughter _everything_. Cursing silently to himself, he slowly walked with regret to his class. Once he got in, all the tables were full except two spaces on either sides of a pink haired girl. '_I wonder what's so ****ed up about this girl'..._ Hidan thought to himself. She seemed to notice him, because a tinge of pink was spreading across her cheeks.

-Sakura's POV—

_**HE'S HOT! *Drools***_

_Shut it! We're Sasuke's fan girl, remember?_

_**More like crazed Sasuke-obsessed hormone driven crazy b******_

_:*(_

_**Don't you emoticon me! That's not even possible. SAY HI TO THE MAN OR I SLIT YOUR THROAT. **_

_That's not possible either… :/_

_**IT IS NOW! YOU HAVE 2 SECONDS!**_

_**2…**_

"Hey, I'm Sakura!" I said, hoping he wouldn't notice her fake cheerfulness. His face visibly twitched, 

_I hope our little war wasn't to obvious_

_**Sakura, you're doing it **_**right now**_**. And he's staring.**_

I looked up, and Inner Sakura was right.

I quickly flashed a smile at him and tried again, "So, what's your name?"

_**Much Better.**_

The mysterious _**Hot**_ boy gave me a puzzled look and seemed to be having a mental war with _him_self.. It did look pretty weird. I need to stop doing that.

_**YOU WILL NEVER SILENCE ME!**_

_SHUT UP!_

_**Guess what your doing roght now? ;D**_

_B-_

"ob" Said the mystery guy.

"Eh?" I responded, confused.

"Bob. My name is Bob." _Bob _said, giving me a fake grin… it was pretty obviously fake.

_**You didn't know until I hinted you.**_

_Shut Up! _

After _that_ I locked Inner in a chest and shoved her deep, deep into my mind.

"So, can I sit here?" Bob asked.

_But… Sasuke…_

_**MMMFPHHH! MMHH! PGHHHH!**_

Inner tried desperately to reach me, but was muffles by the dirty sock I shoved in her mouth.

"Yeah, I guess so" I said, frowning. He replied with a large _fake_ smile of appreciation. I beamed at him the hardest and biggest I could, also opening my eyes as much as I could, hoping to scare him off.

_**You'll thank me.**_

_How did you get out?_

**A/N: So, first Fanfic. I hope you like it. :] I had to delete my old one because I realized I accidentally posted the un-revised version. I revised this one myself… so sorry since I'm not the best. Also, my apologies if this is your second time reading. **

**Okay, so Sakura will probably rarely ever have that much of a part in the story, though this is not the last we will see of her! I'm just getting started with the crack-ness. You have seen NOTHING. Before a horrible rushed version of this was going to be published, it was brought to my attention from my editor, Hamedetta (or so her concealed name shall be), that it was horrid. Well, she said 'weak story line' WHICH MEANS HORRID! :*( Oh well, I tried my hardest (Not really, I didn't try all that hard) to fix it up. REVIEW. More reviews= faster update. 1:15 A.M. is approaching, so my brain isn't function quite the right way. (Although I usually stay up a lot longer than this O.O) So goodnight! I love you! 3 3 REVIEW! [:**


	2. Tobi Is a Good Boy

"Tobi is a good boy! Weasel and shark would not have left without him!" Tobi started wailing, huge anime tears making a puddle around his feat. He continued to do so until a certain artist felt obligated to comfort him. Ha, not really. Deidara was fed up with the wailing and was going to give him something to actually cry about. He turned the doorknob and Tobi was silent for a second. It didn't last long. As soon as the blonde opened the door he was greeted by more screaming.

"Deidara-senpai! I WUVVV YOU!" He then proceeded to hug Deidara around the waist tightly and not let go.

"GET OFF ME, UN!" Deidara shrieked like a little girl, trying to push him off. "But….Tobi is a good boy…" Tobi said, slowly releasing his grip, a tear rolling down his mask.

"Ah, come on! Don't cry, un!" Deidara whined, much like a little girl, once again. " DEIDARA IS A MEANIE-PANTS!" Tobi continued to wail. Deidara quickly covered Tobi's mouth with his hand. Deidara dropped his voice and spoke in a menacing whisper, "You'll wake leader-sama, un." His eye twitched, then went wide in realization of what he had done. He pulled back his hand quickly, like he had been burnt. He then started shrieking at a level even Tobi hadn't come to yet.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! AHHHHHHHHH! I KISSED TOBIIII! GAHHHHHHHH! THIS CAN'T BE HAPPENING! AHHHHH, UN!"

Hidan's eye twitched. That retarded pink-haired girl has been babbling on and on about how good sauce-cakes are. WHAT THE F*** ARE SAUCE CAKES? If he wasn't in disguise, she would have been sacrificed long ago. "Sauce cake looks so good" she mumbled.

"Shut up! What are sauce cakes? They cannot be that good, that you have to go on and on forever about them!" After Hidan's little outburst, the room became completely silent and all eyes were on them. Sakura's face became oddly similar too a tomato as she hid her face in a book and kicked Hidan under the desk. Stupid f***ing little brats. Hidan smirked at the fact he'd embarrassed Sakura so much.

Tobi was wailing at a now gloved Deidara.

"What can I do to make you SHUT UP, UN?" Deidara asked, yelling.

"Play dress up with Tobi." Tobi responded sweetly.

"Never, un"

"DEID-" Tobi started to yell, but was cut off.

"Fine! I'll play. As long as no one sees me, un" Deidara gave in.

"Yay!" Tobi whispered, emphasizing his quietness.

Tobi had gotten Deidara into a light blue frilly dress, with a matching ribbon in his elegant bun and was now finishing his make-up. "OH MY GOSHHH! YOU LOOK SO PRETTY DEI-SENPAI!" Tobi announced loudly. Deidara glared at him, but otherwise ignored it. Tobi became oddly silent, staring at Deidara bashfully.

"What, un?" Deidara asked, annoyed.

"W-Will you… go out with Tobi?" Tobi finished in a slur. Deidara's face turned the color of the clouds on his cloak.

"N-NO, UN!" Deidara yell-whispered, hoping no-one heard them.

"Tobi is a good boy!" Tobi yelled, now crying. Sasori chose this time to reveal his hiding place in the closet, with a camera that captured everything.

**A/N: Whoot! Review! Second chapter: Done. Yeah! Sooo, Review! Love you! Review! Haha, Later. :] But seriously, review. Or I'll sick Hidan to get you.**

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